Be a Model of Presence

One of the attractive aspects of facilitation is that you don’t have to do the work for your group. Though sometimes, what you do have to do is a lot harder. One of those things, which I see as the hallmark of an advanced facilitator, is our ability to be truly present with our group. Let’s explore what I mean by being present and why it is important.

To be present, you have to release your attention to the past or the future and invest your full attention in the present moment alone. In this state of mind, paradoxically, you know nothing because your are applying your brain power to fully experiencing what’s happening with and among your group. This is important because very few of us really ever live fully in the present moment. When we do witness someone in this state, it’s powerful and transformative, not only for them but for everyone in their presence. A fully present facilitator serves as the clearest mirror possible for her group, which in turn the group the opportunity to see themselves–their actions, their thoughts, and their feelings at once clearly–which has a way of revealing the best next action with regard to the work they’re assembled themselves to do.

How Do We Practice Presence? 

•  Practice an attitude of gratitude and appreciation. Be grateful for being in a position of group leadership and grateful for the insights that you trust will come in the moment. This element of trust is essential as it allows you to more easily rest in the present. Fear of not knowing what do do thrusts you into the past or future causing you to miss the opportunities available now.
• Notice when you are evaluating or judging what you or others are doing. Again, these are the voices of the past or future that sap our attention. Further, judgments are a reflection of our own unresolved emotional issues. What a wonderful opportunity to take note and to put it aside for later resolution. Simply notice when you are not in the present and gently return to being present. This is an ongoing practice.
• Be gentle with your course corrections. It’s easy to become frustrated when we begin to notice how often we aren’t present. Any frustration or judgment about our ability to be present is another impediment. We all drift in and out of the present. Just notice this with a neutral or even better, a loving attitude, and come back to the now.
• It doesn’t have to make sense. What comes to you to share with your group, or what happens as a result of how you show up in your group as a result of being present with them doesn’t have to make sense to you. You may begin to notice some incredible things unfold or may be surprised by the things you’re compelled to do or so from this place of present moment awareness. Your job is only to trust and act in accordance with the presents of the present. This is its magic working. You don’t have to figure it out, as it is far beyond your capacity to do so.
• Be a facilitator of few words. The less you say the more your presence is felt and the more you’re intuition will show up.
• Give up your need to be a success. A lot of what we do as group leaders, consciously or not, has to do with our desire to be “successful,” in whatever form that happens to take. Being fully present and responding from the present moment will insure the deepest and most pervasive success your group is ready for.
• Just stay with it. At times resistance, both yours and theirs, may show up to tempt you out of the present. This is the time to continue the practice as resistance often is a sign that breakthroughs are around the corner.
• Practice a meditative discipline. Practicing a meditative discipline is the easiest way to be present. Practice strengthens your ability to be in the present with your groups, particularly when things heat up. Mastering presence in the privacy of your own home will be the best gift you can give to yourself and your groups

Action 

Practice being present with your next group. Come prepared as usual, and give up your need to know, say, or do anything to assure some preconceived notion of success. I’m interested in hearing what happened. So please share your comments, experiences, questions, or feedback with all of us below. Also view our video below, How to Stay Present as a GroupLeader that walks you through an exercise in presence.

To be quite honest, the more I learn about group process the easier and the harder it gets. Harder because every group that comes along surprises me in some way. Perhaps with increasing humility inspired by my increasing years, I tend to look and listen just a little closer to the nuances present in each new group. And though human dynamics in each group have many similarities, they are also unique in their makeup and their challenges. As I come to recognize that being surprised is part of the game, I come to welcome the mystery more as an adventure to enjoy than an unknown to fear. And trust that going on the voyage equipped with my essentials, I cannot fail and commit myself to the prospect that we will all gain through the experience in some way.

Identify Your Core Gifts

What is your gift as a human being? How do you significantly advance the work of any group you lead or participate in, simply by showing up authentically and doing what comes naturally to you? I believe that it might be a great exercise to answer this question in the form of a handful of facilitative perspectives, attitudes, or actions, to strengthen everything else you do as a group servant, and provide great value even if you show up with nothing else. Here are some of my own as I see them:

I show up as the clearest mirror I can be. One of the greatest insights people can gain from each other is a view of themselves from the outside. We sometimes go through our lives so much on automatic pilot we lose the connection between cause and effect. That is, those things we do that we might not notice (causes) that are bringing results that we might not like (effects). It’s a rare privilege granted to you as facilitators and group leaders to point out and reflect the actions of others and how we experience them. Remember that polished mirrors reflect best. So practice releasing inner chatter as best you can, and marshall the courage to express what you see and sense, if it will explicitly advance your group’s purpose, as clearly and as compassionately as you can.

I come with beginner’s mind. I believe that there’s great power in approaching every new group as if it’s the first one I’ve ever worked with. To approach each life experience with “beginner’s mind” is a tall order, particularly so as our experience base grows. Yet the fresh openness to mystery and possibility offers those we serve a potent invitation to see the world in this same way themselves. Unencumbered with past failures and worn out solutions, chances are better that a fresh new idea or solution will emerge.

It’s never about me, even when it is. It’s essential to take nothing personally as a group leader, even when under personal attack. People only attack when they’re hurting or scared. Remembering this will afford you perspective you can use when walking through the hot spots of group process. Quiet presence, again like a mirror, in the face of attack is disarming, even alarming, in a world out of control. Cultivating the ability to reflect peace in the face of fear has a transforming effect on others.

I surrender the task to them. It’s imperative to trust in the resources of the group and in the process in which you have them engaged to accomplish the tasks before them. If you are afraid that they cannot accomplish their goal and apply your genius to save them, they will smell your fear and be weakened by your efforts to help. Your trust, if well placed, and backed with conviction will inspire.

I’m a compass who facilitates the course. If you do nothing but help a group come to a clear understanding of their goal, the average group will have gained a great deal. If you then serve as their beacon, amidst confusion and haste, helping them compare each action to the results they seek, forward progress is inevitable.

Action

Drawing on the above examples, make a list of the key gifts you bring to your groups that are effortless for you to give, Please share them with us. We’d love to hear from you! Add your comments below to share your questions, feedback, or experience on this topic.

It is used by organizational development consultants, facilitators, trainers, business coaches, project managers, meeting leaders, clergy, and other group leaders. Still, it’s not well known by the majority of people who meet every day in groups. Even among its practitioners, a clear definition and placement of this field within the larger field of human science is difficult to agree upon.

While any noteworthy accomplishment in this day and age takes the focused energy of committed groups, people working ineffectively together is the most often cited obstacle to finding solutions to problems.

Facilitation is now the technology of choice for improving the
effectiveness and efficiency of groups.

The above quote by Richard Weaver & John Farrell, authors of Managers as Facilitators, go so far as to say that…Facilitation is the most important role emerging in the modern workplace.

Speaking across centuries, a sage delivers timeless wisdom on the essence of leadership, and the spirit of facilitation…

A good leader is best when people barely know that he leads. A good leader talks little but when the work is done,
the aim fulfilled, all others will say,
“We did this ourselves.”
— Lao Tsu—

Facilitation, in its simplest form, is the act of helping groups to make a change as easily as possible. It’s about helping a group get from point A to point B where these points could represent any of the following:

Point A  ===> Point B
Problem ===> Solution
Conflict  ===> Resolution
Confusion ===>Clear Plan
Chaos  ===> Order (or bound chaos)
Disagreement ===> Consensus

One distinguishing feature of facilitation over that of other forms of leadership is that the facilitator does not come into the group with a pre-conceived solution or desired outcome. Instead, he or she leads the group to discover, clarify, and converge on their collectively desired outcomes.

Why Facilitation?

Much of our lives are spent working, playing, and being in groups. We enjoy dinner conversations around a well trimmed table, take-up a round of cards, suit-up for a Tuesday night soccer league, visit a park with our kids, or deliver a new product to a customer…all with the participation of others. Yet, how many of us take a moment to think about the deep well of potential contained in these groups? What would it take to really unleash this potential? How much more meaningful, impacting, and downright fun could our lives be if we could access the extent of this tremendous power?

As local and global challenges such as pollution, terrorism, global warming, nuclear threats, pandemics, etc., become increasingly complex and convoluted, unleashing the potential in groups is imperative.

So please tell us, what is facilitation to you and why is it important?

Action

How will you incorporate these items into your planning for the facilitation of large groups? Have we missed anything? Share your questions, feedback, or experience on this topic below.